Radical...

Disclaimer: This is my attempt at "thinking in a straight line." A difficult process for me right now with all the thoughts running through my head. It's likely to be a little disjointed...

I started this book back at the end of the summer after a friend recommended it to me. It's been good...it's been challenging...it's been something I've needed to read.

I'm about halfway through (I took about a month long hiatus during an insanely crazy season of life....more on that later), but I'm ready to dive back in, and as I do so, I stopped to reflect on a passage that has stuck with me almost constantly from the beginning of the book.

Looking at Jesus' calling on the disciples:

"Ultimately, Jesus was calling them to abandon themselves. They were leaving certainty for uncertainty, safety for danger, self-preservation for self-denunciation." (Radical, pg. 12)

Wow. Yikes. Scary. But....kind of exhilarating too if you stop and think about it. What an adventure! A crazy, scary adventure....but an adventure nonetheless. I think so often as kids, we look around and dream big crazy dreams that our parents, friends, family encourage us to pursue...telling us we can do anything, be anything, dream big, shoot for the moon. We're not fearful....we feel invincible. But then we grow up...and somewhere along the lines most of us (not all of us) allow ourselves to sit back a bit. Step more cautiously. Temper our dreams. Risk less. Maybe it's fear...maybe it's past failures. Who knows. But we lose that desire for an adventure.

*I should clarify....when I speak of dreams of childhood...I think those are good dreams. God given dreams. However, I'm not talking about a desire to get back to those specific dreams. Rather I'm using it to paint a picture of a simpler sense of trust and and willingness to "jump in" that we posses as children in contrast to what often amounts to timid, unsure steps as adults.

My question to myself has been this...what hinders that desire to embark on a wild adventure? For me, it's a combination of so many things. But as I truly stop and think, I am reminded: The final victory is in Christ. He has known the end from the beginning...and the same spirit that allowed Christ to live the most RADICAL life ever lived....lives in me. He's guiding my every step if I'll simply rest and trust...Even a step to abandon myself.

This is my present reality....Learning to rest and trust in the radical life that Christ calls me to. As a dear friend puts it...I'm trying to learn to live palms up, and open handed...ready to give and receive from the Lord as He asks.

And it's a good place to be.

"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it...So therefor, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple." Luke 14:26-28, 33

On trusting

Confession. I'm a planner...and when I don't know the plan I get impatient. I am an impatient planner. And while I'm impatiently waiting for the plan....I worry about the plan that I haven't even heard about yet. I know....pretty ridiculous eh?

I'm learning a truth that is new to me these days, and it is this:

I don't need to know the plan. And even when I don't know the plan, I can still be at peace.

How?

Because God knows the plan. In fact, He is the author of the plan, and the one who carries it out (Hebrews 12:2). He's known the plan in its entirety from the beginning of time and nothing is going to stand in the way of it's completion (Ecclesiastes 3:9-14). Not even me. Not my worrying, not my compulsive efforts to plan out my life....nothing.

So do I just sit back and do nothing? No. I still pray, listen, and take steps....but the fear that accompanies worry is gone!

That's the new reality I am beginning to learn.

^"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ²Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." ~Hebrews 12:1-2

"What does the worker gain from his toil? ¹⁰ I have seen the burden God has laid on men. ¹¹ He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. ¹² I know that there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live. ¹³ That everyone may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all his toil—this is the gift of God. ¹⁴ I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him." ~Ecclesiastes 3:9-14

Impress or Impact

I was visiting a church this past weekend for work, and got the chance to hear a different Pastor preach...and I was challenged!  Love it when that happens...

Have you ever considered the difference between Impressing someone versus Impacting someone?  I never really had, but he offered a good thought.

You can impress someone in the short term....but impacting someone takes long-term effort and energy.

You see, impressing someone can be fairly simple, it doesn't necessarily take a lot of time, and the person you are trying to impress doesn't need to have a deep understanding of who you are.  You can keep them at arms length, yet let them get just close enough to impress them.

Yet impacting takes work.  It's difficult, it takes time, and it requires closeness: them in your space, and you in theirs.

I think this rings true in many areas of life....not just relationally.  Take a job for instance.  In the short term, you can come in, show proficiency, keep things running smoothly, and earn praise and accolades.  But have you made a dramatic difference?  Have you tried to leave a lasting impact in the organization?

Often in our lives, we sail through the impressing phase, hit a difficult spot...and rather than digging in and fighting through it, we give up thinking "I've done something good here.  It's time to move on."  NO!!!!  The good stuff...the great stuff is just ahead! 

Impact comes when you hit a challenge, dig in, fight through, and come out on the other side.  You've worked hard, taken time, and gotten messy doing it....but what a glorious mess.

I'm tired of just making an impression...I want to make an impact. 

Acts

Tonight, I had the opportunity to speak at a college service in West Lafayette.  I am too tired right now to really say anything of substance about what I talked about....but in a nutshell, it was about the community of believers in Acts.  (More on this later....maybe tomorrow)

If you haven't read the book of Acts...READ IT.  It's amazing.  The church has such an incredible beginning!

I was blessed by the opportunity to be there speaking to the group.  Although I was nervous and felt unprepared, I enjoyed being to able to share from scripture.  There's something that fires me up about challenging people (students specifically), and I find that I walk away challenged myself.  Even beyond that, I want so desperately for people to "get it"...  To truly understand what their faith is all about, and if God gives me a chance to play a tiny role in that...I'll take it!

Do You Love Me?

"Look at Jesus.  The world did not pay any attention to him.  He was crucified and put away.  His message of love was rejected by a world in search of power, efficiency, and control.  But there he was, appearing with wounds in his glorified body to a few friends who had eyes to see, ears to hear, and hearts to understand.  This rejected, unknown, wounded Jesus simply asked, 'Do you love me, do you really love me?'  He whose only concern had been to announce the unconditional love of God had only one question to ask, 'Do you love me?'

The question is not: How many people take you seriously?  How much are you going to accomplish?  Can you show some results?  But: Are you in love with Jesus?  Perhaps another way of putting the question would be: Do you know the incarnate God?"

~Henri Nouwen, In the Name of Jesus (36-37)

What do we measure ourselves by?  Our accomplishments, our status, our results?  Or do we find purpose in our most important task: loving Jesus?  Out of this all other things will follow.

I have found myself challenged by this recently.